No Roman Candles

Joe Dirt: So you're gonna tell me that you don't have no Black Cats, no Roman Candles, no Screaming Meemies?

 Kickin' Wing: No.

 Joe Dirt: Oh come on man, you don't got no Ladyfingers, Buzz Bottles, Snicker Bombs, Church Burners, Finger Blasters, Gut Busters, Zippedy-doo-das, Crap Flappers?

Kickin' Wing: No, I don't.

Joe Dirt: You're gonna stand there, owning a fireworks stand and tell me you dont have any Whistling Bungholes, no Spleen Splitters, Whisker Biscuits, Honkey Lighters, Hüsker Düs, Hüsker Don'ts, Cherry Bombs, Nipsy Dazers, with or without the Scooter Stick, or one single Whistling Kitty-chaser?

Kickin' Wing: No.

Joe Dirt: Why?

Kickin' Wing: Because Snakes and Sparklers are the only ones I like.

Joe Dirt - 2001

I have never seen this movie. I searched firecracker quotes and found this. I think it's hilarious. Totally made my night. Long night that it has been. I am finalizing one of the most fun projects I've done in a while. I am testing firecrackers. Well... not firecrackers exactly. These ones you explode inside the house. So. Much. Fun! Right before Christmas I found a pack of party poppers in the clearance section at JoAnn's. 75% off. Score! I have always been secretly curious about party poppers. In my closet they sat. Then sometime around March I flagged this Oh Happy Day tutorial about how to make confetti invitations with party poppers. Serendipitous don't you think? This year my boys are obsessed with 4th of July decor. They have cut + colored bunting and flags. Stars and firecrackers. I realized that it's time to make firecrackers.

I give the tutorial **** stars out of five. The instructions are clear and easy to follow. The photography is wonderful. The idea is brilliant. I just couldn't get the thing to explode using the closure method she chose. Though, admittedly, I didn't have label paper so the failure could be entirely operator error. The method that worked best for me is the one the inventors intended. A tiny piece of paper tape. Really tiny. Like 1/8" or even 1/16". It's the only thing that worked in my trials [in a moment when you are unwrapping the label from the tube you may find a very long piece of tiny masking tape that can be re-used as your closure]. I used Jordan's guides to make a template with masks so you can pretty it up any way you like [I used Elle's Studio USA Vintage Journaling Tags]. The template is in the box.

Here are my suggestions:

Follow Jordan's instructions through step 3 [though instead of cutting a new circle piece/ topper I just peeled the label off. It doesn't look very pretty, but it's covered for the most part anyway. Also, before removing the wrapper make a mark or something to indicate which side goes up. I thought it would be easy to remember, but I kept having to check].

*If you're using Jordan's printable labels I would cut the top 1/2 inch off. If you're using my template/masks the cut lines are marked for this.

Step 4: Start with the circle top. Use a piece of clear tape approx. 1/2 inch wide to make a strong hinge approx. This way only one side of your top will pop and you won't lose your lid. You don't need to stick it to the tube yet, just let it hang out there. It is easier to decorate the top if it's not attached.

I really liked the look of the wrapper folded on itself. I thought it had the look of a firecracker. I mimicked this by using the 1/2 inch remnant. I smeared the top with glue and proceeded to make pleats around the top. Fold and stick your way around the top, following the shape of the circle as closely as you can. If you want a fuse just poke a hole in the top and feed your yarn or whatever through and tape it down on the underside. I think it would be fun to find some more realistic looking fuse. Mine's not looking so pretty. Hooray! I have this super fun paper cording from the girls birthday packaging. Vintage Fisher Price record player = Love.

Step 5: Stick your label/wrapper around the tube. I used a glue stick and sealed the full seam with clear tape. Stuff it with confetti. Jordan has some great photos of the mechanics and how to reassemble those.One thing I think she missed pointing out is the notch. You'll need to be aware of it when you lock the spring down. This photo is of the locked in mechanism and a decent view of the notch mentioned. To put set mechanism into the tube you will just have to use your muscles and press it in. I thought it would screw in but it doesn't. It's a snap. Other than that... Yay! Happy 4th of July from my ragamuffin children!

One more thing. You'll need to tape the top closed after stuffing. This is where the tiny piece of paper tape/ painters tape comes in. Did I mention tiny [see photo above]? If it's too thick [or too sticky] it won't release. Notice we had this problem on one of them in the video. It was a brand new unhandled piece of tape. As a precaution I would stick + unstick it a couple of times in the future. Enjoy!